Being fat and buying t-shirts

I'm not going to beat around the bush with today's blog, if being perfectly honest and blunt is good enough for Peter, Bjorn and John and Nirvana's lyrics (2 bands I'm well into at the minute, I recommend you listen to both their older stuff) then it's good enough for me.

Okay basically...I'm fat. Right? You know it, I know it. I'm a big guy, a gentlemen of bigger sorts, a man of the round kind. Does it bother you? I'd hope not. Does it bother me? Yes, to a certain extent. Do I really care? Do I fuck, but I'd like to try not being fat.

It's not hard to tell that I'm fat, its just one of those things I guess, I hate the word fat though, it seems like a derogatory term, as if every time it's said it's offending someone but regardless I'm saying it about myself so it's alright.

When I say 'I'd like to try not being fat' I mean I'd like to be skinny, just to see what it feels like. However, my family history and general shape of my whole family forbids me to do so, now don't get it twisted and think I'm blaming my weight on the history of my family, it's nobody's fault but my own when it comes down to it, but I'm saying I could never be as skinny or slim as some of my friends 'cause of this reason.

I've always been big, for as long as I can remember, I honestly 100% put it down to the fact that I just really like eating, there's nothing else too it, it's a nice thing to do, everyone does it and enjoys it otherwise not everyone would have to do it in order to stay alive. Makes sense? It just seems that I have to eat whatever is there (providing I like it), a whole meal? I can't leave a bit and 'be full', scoff scoff scoff, you have some left overs? That would be a waste, scoff scoff scoff, you're going to Donatellos? But I've just ate...argh so what, scoff scoff scoff. The worst is when I feel like I have to eat, usually when I'm just bored, living at my grandparents house usually means that they're regularly stocked up on all sorts of shitty sweets, chocolate and crisps etc. can't go wrong really, and then referring back to before, if it's there, I'll eat it, so I'll eat up all the chocolates in the pack like it's nothing. Bad times. The main reason I'm going on about this is I'm internet shopping for T-Shirts. I'm a huge fan of cool t-shirts, you can usually catch me in plain jeans, awful shoes, an over worn and trampy hoody with an un-cool outdated t-shirt on, this is because I cannot get more 'cool' t-shirts because of my size, it's a terrible cycle. I can't seem to loose weight because I'm too lazy to get up and do any exercise and all the while I continue to buy fast food and drink shit. It's terrible. I really don't want to go to a gym, as laughable a comment that may be coming from a person my size, I just don't want to go. I tried before, went for about a month straight and did well, ate right, lost enough weight to slip back into my cool Pink Floyd T-shirt (that was awesome) and then I went to Leeds festival and started eating irregularly and eating shit too and then didn't stop when I came back home either. But once again that sounds like an excuse, I'm not blaming anyone or anything for my weight, only myself.

Side note: Music is good, it free's the mind of anything and temporarily takes you to another place where colours and shapes occur, well it does for me anyway, real music should do the same for you if you listen properly. There is nothing better than a feeling where there is nothing in the world apart from you and a guitar solo and the beautiful noises and shapes it makes.

Then there's always the drinking and pizza's on the way home, that's a shitter, I'm a sucker for most things when I'm drunk but food has to be up there with the best of them. It's awful, its an awful situation, I don't feel comfortable when I go out with my friends when they're all trying new clothes on or whatever and I'm standing there in a RUN NYC t-shirt that's been worn so many times its been printed onto my man boobs underneath, it feels like people are laughing at me and I'm not really part of the group. It also says something when I regard my 'best shirt' as that stupid fucking furry man one. What a pathetic item of clothing that is. Generally being out with my friends is an uncomfortable experience as it is, I'm not saying names (I'm probably sure you can guess who I mean anyway!) but it's not as if my friends are ugly. No homo. And they dress pretty cool and get to wear all the trendy stuff in their size and then theres me following slightly behind with a guy playing guitar in a hat thats peeling off the front of an awlful plain black t-shirt, it's just really annoying and frustrating. But like I say, I only have myself to blame on this one and I'm the only one that can get myself out of this!

All in all I should really loose weight, but don't know how too maintain the stability to continue on a sturdy diet or 'eating good plan' as Jan likes to call them ¬_¬. I've been on plenty, tried them all and it takes a lot of time, something I'm not good with, but they all work or have worked for a certain amount of time and then something has came along and I've fell into the trap of the kebab wrap and then it starts all over again. I think at this point in time I'm the biggest I've ever been, I hate getting photographs taken 'cause I hate the way I look. I have no idea how my girlfriend can put up with it, she doesn't even seem to take note of it. It's not like I have a dashing face with a beautiful head of hair either! (hence why she's a keeper).

I really need to stop being so godamn motherfucking lazy and do something about it, I suppose I could have it as a 'new years resolution' or be all 'FROM THIS DAY FORWARD I WILL NOT EAT A THING THAT DOESN'T GROWN ON A TREE' but fuck that shit, that won't work, I don't know what will but by god I do hope that by this time next year I will be able to fit into the official John Frusciante T-Shirts off his website, and wear them in white with proud instead of trying to hide my many-a-roll in the visibleness of white!

Thanks for reading anyway. If you managed to get this far you can claim a reward from me...or Dipper, yeah, hassle Dipper for free shit

Realising and work

Today was a realising day for me. It turns out a second year of a degree can and will be quite hard work. My lecturer landed some work on us today which will takes ages to do and require a lot of hard work, that combined with the rest of the work we have to do all adds up to an amount that I don't wish to think about. This got me thinking, as I sat not doing the work the lecturer set us, that all this work I will eventually do (as will the rest of my class) will more than likely lead me no where. The work itself, the exercises set, I cannot see being used in future life. For anybody's information I do a music degree and before you say it no, its not 'just sitting round playing drums all day' as my girlfriend always says, you silly silly people. Back to the work. The exercise we had set involved replacing chords with Roman numerals? I know, what the fuck right? I then realised that I'm already in 2 bands, looking for more in the future probably, I am also the drummer! Who doesn't need to use chords or how to replace them with Roman numerals. But coming out of all that I realised that it was for the very end of my course when everything gets forgotten about, all the work sheets, exercises, recording etc. and I get that little piece of paper that says I have a degree. Now, having a degree, what's the real point? Especially having a music degree, I can hardly walk into EMI records, flash them my certificate and get a record deal, but I can 'get far in teaching with it'. I DON'T WANT TO TEACH MAN RICHARD, STOP SAYING THAT. I want to play drums forever and ever, maybe there's such a job as a drum tester, that would be epic. I can always dream I suppose...

Mock The Week is well funny. Oh, and that fucking 'Glee' is awful, people who enjoyed it should be killed. Ahem.

I suppose this is all leading up to the fact that I will have nothing to fall back on. I've gone too far into music to turn back and get a day job. I'd like to say I've got too much talent to let it go to waste, I haven't, I'm just an annoying drummer who taps on everything when the Lady Gaga song is playing on the radio. I'm sorry if a lot of this is rambling on I'm watching Mock The Week while typing this and half concentrating on both, I'm also tired and a bit annoyed at this and stressed over this work. But I do wish that I could just make it in one of my bands, I know it'll never happen, it just won't. I'm not one of those 'guys who'll get somewhere' but at the same time I can't see myself in a regular day job settling down being an ordinary guy. I don't know, the future is a funny thing to think about and when I say future I don't mean 2 or 3 months I mean 5 or 6 years. Imagine yourself in 5 or 6 years now? Strange isn't it.

But none the less, its pointless me wishing and talking shit on here, I need to get out there, record songs, play gigs, get all up in it. Which I think I'm doing enough of I just don't think I'm doing it in the right places, but, once again as I say. We'll have to wait and see what the future holds.

Wish me luck motherfuckers.

Adverts and blogging

Okay, turns out this whole blogging thing might not be as bad as I first thought, I did make this account when I was very tired and annoyed at life in general, but after thinking about it and thinking about things that I would like to talk about that no one will care about about from you crazy kids on interwebs it doesn't seem like such a bad idea.

Right, that was a side note, now to get to the point.

Adverts, everybody hates them and refuses to watch them and everyone knows this, I'm sure even the people that make the adverts know this, every once in a while an advert comes along that we all like and yeah we smile when it comes on (like that Meerkat one, everyone loves that) but I'm sure if even the good ones didn't exist no one would care. Yeah they're there for a reason, to promote the business and products that the business makes but the businesses that can afford to make adverts don't need them! People hear about new products all the time (when I talk about adverts I mean the ones on TV that always interrupt your favourite program) and people will still buy the product if they need/want it. Which bring me to the next question. Why are adverts still on TV? The TV company makes money off them silly! Of course, where would anyone be without money! In fairness that's a true statement, we'd all individually be fucked if we didn't have money but when I say the TV companies get money I don't mean pocket money from your grandparents, I'm talking millions, which, again, seems sill that the businesses will still put adverts on the TV knowing that people don't like and usually don't watch them 'cause either way, the business is still paying out money to the TV company for them to show their advert, plus the money it cost for them to make the advert, getting whoever is the hot topic of the moment in to promote to mindless idiots who think 'ooo well if Cheryl Cole can look like that I can too if I buy what she's saying is right to buy'. Fucking tools. Not the point, adverts are stupid on all fronts.

I've just got a text of my girlfriend, always makes me smile when she texts first.

Novelty adverts, that's my next rant! Adverts that have gimmicks or phrases that people end up saying, for example, the Meerkat I referred to earlier, I do like it I must admit but that is only because I have a soft spot for Meerkat's. The gimmick is that people get confused between 'compare the Meerkat' and 'compare the market'. Don't be so fucking silly no one can get them confused, even so they put this advert out there for the world to see and people always remember the advert and the little 'simples' tag line but how many of those people that recognise that actually bought their car insurance from Compare The Market? I bet next to none, thus, rendering the advert a waste of time and money and that is what the business will be remembered for, in my eyes anyway, that little furry motherfucker. There's plenty more stupid fucking adverts out there too I'm sure you know the ones, the 'Go Compare' one that one about trading in your phone for money where it shows lots of 'everyday' people saying 'SO COOL YEAH, TRADE YOUR PHONE IN AND GET MONEY AND THEN YOU CAN BUY SHIT' obviously with them showing everyday people it means we too can trade our phones in and buy shit. Can we balls.

Anyway, rant over, I hate adverts, they're stupid, annoying and pretty much pointless.

Radiohead are mint.

Inevitably another waste of time

So I saw a few of my friends had one of these accounts set up and also the bass player in my band, Masamune, set one up for the band, for what reason I have no idea, so I decided that in order to be up to date and in with the cool kids I needed one of these to waste my time and vent anger probably aimed at the opposite sex with. That and also the fact that I have no life and I'm a sucker for typing up shit that no one will ever care about nor read.

Typically I have no idea what to write about, that's also ironic considering this is a blog in which I am supposed to write and yet I am actually writing about not having anything to write about (ISN'T THAT FUNNY HAR HAR HAR LAUGH YOU BASTARDS) but I refuse to fall into the ever re-appearing captions that I seem to see on plenty peoples FaceTubes and MyBooks all over the place, you know the kinds, the ones that usually have one or many phrases such as

'erm lol a dunno wat 2 say about mesel really lol'

'well am just a canny lad lookin 4 a gud tym wit me m8s n that'

'anythin else just add iz and al tel ya al about iz haha'

Fucking dicks

So in order to avoid such phrases I will continue to bitch and moan and talk about fuck all because, like I said, no one will ever care nor read this.

So, I like music, my girlfriend, my friends and Left for Dead 2, brilliant. I wish I could start all conversations with new people I meet like that, and I wish that could be all I say, I fucking hate people. You know, I'm not usually a bitter man but I seem to be slowly becoming one, I blame the state of music today and Richard Naisbit. Music is a huuuuuuge part of my life, I imagine if your reading this and know me you've already gathered that, it's all I talk about and pretty much all I do but it makes me happy and it's taken over my life so I cannot complain one little bit. The state of music has gone tits up though really, in the past 30 or so years. They used to be so many good bands and artists out who just made good music that people used to listen too, that's how it should be right? Music is something we listen too right? 'Cause I seem to have forgotten? Is it not all about image these days? How outrageous your outfit is? How many fireworks your stage show has? (In fairness, having a good stage show all adds up for me, that was a bad example but the outfit part I'm right about!) How much sex you can incorporate into your lyrics. I say your lyrics, I mean lyrics you've had written for you by some dickhead in a suit. That seems to be all that matters these days but what's the point in me complaining? It's not like I'm going to change anything, seems such a shame too, I'm in 2 bands who work hard enough to make our own music after being influenced by so many different bands and artists who also work hard enough to make their own music and then I see fucking Lady Gaga on the TV strutting around singing the same fucking song she had out last week wearing something that looks like it should be ran by batteries and it pisses me off knowing she'll be a millionaire. The only thing I can give her credit for is she doesn't mime but even then I shouldn't be giving her credit for that! She's a singer, surely she'd be able to sing live! Well you'd think wouldn't you. Like I say, however, it's not like I'll make a difference complain, especially on here 'cause no one will ever care nor read this.

I have an itchy nose.

What the hell man, why am I even writing a blog? What on earth is the point? I don't get why people of my generation and age seem to find it so difficult to go a day or two without getting on a computer, I must admit I'm the same! I'm constantly on facebook and the rest of it but I have no idea why, my grandparents got along fine when they we're kids without it, given that they are fucking insane now like, but they seemed to get along playing in the streets and playing board games when they we're younger. Technology pisses me off sometimes, it seems we've come so far and so dependant on it that we've fucked ourself over with it. I'm too tired to go into that though, that's for a 'different blog post' providing anyone reads this enough for me to make another one, 'cause like I say no one will ever care nor read this.

Yeah, that's about all I can be arsed with for my 'first blog post' fucking woop de woop, dicks

So I'm going to go to bed and think about what I've done being the naughty boy that I am. Be sure to come again now, I know how much you've enjoyed this if you've cared and read it. Bu-bye for now